I read Losing Hope as slowly as I could because I just didn't want it to ever end. There were moments where I just closed my eyes and sat there sobbing, letting the emotions sink in. There were scenes that gave me full body chills - from head to toe. There were times when I had to just stop and read a single sentence over and over again because it was so beautifully written. And I loved that it didn't change him, just. But now I'm just realizing that there was so much more going on. I mean, after reading the whole of Hopeless, I really felt like I knew him. You know, it's funny 'cuz you think you know a character. We see a lot of his past - it's heart breaking and devastating but we live it with him. This isn't just Hopeless from Holder's POV, this is his story during Hopeless, his story before Hopeless, and his story apart from Hopeless. You need to understand just how much I mean those words. Losing Hope took me through all the same emotions of Hopeless but they were magnified because every single thing that happened now carried the weight of the emotion you already knew from Hopeless PLUS the new emotions created by all the new things we learned in Losing Hope about Holder. But if you piece it together with Hopeless, you just get EVERYTHING. It's not just an alternate perspective, it's actually a whole different part of the story entirely. I felt this book with every single part of my heart and soul. Everything he experienced, I went through it with him. I thought I already loved Dean with all my heart, but now I love him more. Losing Hope was just absolute, beautiful perfection. I can't stop living, breathing and feeling this story.
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